It's the SMALL things

For the second time I'm joining in with Cas's linky but adding my own, unique, warped sense of humour to it. And a touch of Thompson reality. 

The focus of the link-up is to give recognition to the small things in life which, whilst often barely noticeable if you are totally caught up in the coping and managing of life can making the difference - the immeasurably large yet essentially tiny difference between skimming along the surface or disappearing beneath.

This week, I could have focused on the small but hugely significant event happening this Friday. After nearly six years A's feeding tube is coming out. But given that he is actually extremely apprehensive about it and we have been deliberating it for months it doesn't really qualify. 

Then yesterday, whilst struggling for the umpteenth time to pick up son #2 from a friend taking both twins in the car I had a lightbulb moment. Resigned to the fact that transporting children subscribes to the cabbage/goat/fox problem where there is only one possible combination or children function at quantum level. Which is actually really, really small.

So what on EARTH can something so ridiculously simple as getting children into and out of a car have to do with Quantum Theory? (You've obviously not met my children...) Maybe you have only one or two small people to herd, or have mastered the art of timed embarkation, but here we are still firmly at Stage 1, yet to learn the secret of Travel without Fighting. Actually, that would probably be Stage 2 or even 3. Entering the Vehicle without Parental Trauma would probably be a more appropriate Stage 1, which we are currently working on.

Don't get me wrong, we've made progress. It's been a good few years months weeks since someone was actually hurt in the process and we have now progressed to Noise Control. This is proving to be a tricky module to master and no amount of cajoling, incentivising or threatening is yet to work. Our driveway acts like a megaphone too, the early morning school run is probably all our neighbour needs by way of an alarm clock. And just as you think everyone is IN the car, and you turn your back to lock the door - they all fall out again.

What IS it with cars?? 

So last night I managed eventually to load the twins into the car. 

Book to read? Check.

Torch to see by (and shine in Mummy's eyes?) Check.

DVD? (We are ONLY going FIVE MINUTES down the road for goodness sake!!!) CHECK.

Pencil to jab sister with? Check.

Coats, as it's raining? No Chance. 

Shoes? Um. No. Slippers any good?

We arrive at H's friend's house, and really I only have to ring the doorbell and collect him. There is NO need to unload children. But no, no amount of parental emphasis on this point was sustained, because you see what I did there? I rang the doorbell. I TOOK MY EYE OFF THE BALL. Or rather the children. Same thing.

And that was my lightbulb moment.

It seems that children only behave when you have your eye on them. Like the unwatched electron they descend into chaos when unwatched. Chaos everywhere. The very small but very significant reality that is subatomic level physics. Or as my geeky husband put it 

"Unobserved twins become entangled in a superposition of naughty states, from which it can sometimes take several hours to collapse the wave function" #geekyphysicsjoke

So there you have it. Clearly every good parenting manual needs to have a chapter on Quantum Mechanics. (And that second pair of eyes teachers are supposed to have in the back of their heads might just come in handy!)

Which leaves me with one important question. If you DO take your eyes of your children, and chaos ensues, but no one - not even you witness it...... Did it really happen?  !!
 #RealityAvoidance